Llamas
I've decided. I'm going to invest in an army of llamas. You might find it a silly idea. Why not elephants, alligators, or puffins for that matter?
No. Not acceptable. Llamas are a much better choice.
For example, llamas can spit. Very useful against enemies in battle. Person coming too close for comfort? Give them a face full of llama drool. It will keep them occupied until you can call in the reinforcements.
Also, you can ride them into battle. A lot of other creatures are large, and slow moving, but a llama can take you from point A to B in 2.7 seconds flat. Why would you ever want to ride anything else? It could also surprise your enemies. They won't expect you to be so cunning that you choose the llama as your mount, because the secret of the speedy llama is one only known to the very best of the best army commanders.
Llamas are also soft. Their fur is quite fuzzy and warm, so your soldiers will never have to worry about spending the night shivering beside a pile of wood that won't light and eating raw fish. You can make coats and blankets out of their fur (wool?), or you can grab the nearest one and use it as your personal heater.
And you can put hats on them. Make your army look original, and surprise your enemies! They'll never know what hit them when you come barreling down the battleground with your rides wearing lovely sparkly party hats and diving helmets.
I think it's a fantastic idea. Excuse me as I go and buy some llamas and hats.
That is all.
No. Not acceptable. Llamas are a much better choice.
For example, llamas can spit. Very useful against enemies in battle. Person coming too close for comfort? Give them a face full of llama drool. It will keep them occupied until you can call in the reinforcements.
Also, you can ride them into battle. A lot of other creatures are large, and slow moving, but a llama can take you from point A to B in 2.7 seconds flat. Why would you ever want to ride anything else? It could also surprise your enemies. They won't expect you to be so cunning that you choose the llama as your mount, because the secret of the speedy llama is one only known to the very best of the best army commanders.
Llamas are also soft. Their fur is quite fuzzy and warm, so your soldiers will never have to worry about spending the night shivering beside a pile of wood that won't light and eating raw fish. You can make coats and blankets out of their fur (wool?), or you can grab the nearest one and use it as your personal heater.
And you can put hats on them. Make your army look original, and surprise your enemies! They'll never know what hit them when you come barreling down the battleground with your rides wearing lovely sparkly party hats and diving helmets.
I think it's a fantastic idea. Excuse me as I go and buy some llamas and hats.
That is all.
Excellent choice..! :D
ReplyDeleteThanks much! (: Llamas are excellent.
DeleteWas that a llamas with hats reference? CaaARrrll!
ReplyDeleteWho's Carl? Did I miss something?
DeleteI agree. It's obvious that llamas are far superior to almost all other animals. Except of course, for Alpacas, who are almost just like llamas, except smaller.
ReplyDeleteI love the sparkly hat idea. You, my dear, are a genius.
Alpacas are fuzzier too, I think.
DeleteThank you! *bows*