Not Even Myself: A Short Story

Hello, lovelies!

I've got a short story for you guys today. I actually wrote it for my Communications (English) class. The idea behind it was to create a hero out of nothing within a few days, and also keep the story short and sweet. Please feel free to leave me feedback in the comments as always. (:

NOTE: This is an entirely fictional work! Any connections or references are purely coincidental. Thanks!

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Not Even Myself

The accident made me hate my reflection. Being body-slammed by a car means that I came out with more than just a few bruises, but for the most part, I was okay. Nothing exploded or went missing, and nothing was too bad that they couldn’t fix it with a few stitches and a boatload of medication. Even my head was still attached at the end, which the doctors seemed very pleased by. If it had been any other part of my body, I would have been okay with a jagged, horrifying scar marking me for the rest of my life. But it was my face. And I’ve realized since then that it’s a little hard to hide your face unless you want to upgrade to a brown paper bag to put over it.

Once I was well enough to return to school, I almost wished I’d upgraded to that brown paper bag. My classmates would stare at me with wide eyes, some not even trying to do it discreetly. My face burned hot as I practically ran to each of my classes, trying to hide the half of my face that was disfigured. During my painting class, the colors I used were dark and dangerous. A big change from the usual sunny pastels and vibrant paints I liked so much. My best friend, Eleanor, watched me with sad eyes as I slashed and swirled my brush in a whirlwind of grief and fury. I brushed my chestnut-colored bangs forward with my free hand, wishing I’d grown them out long enough that they could cover up my unintentional Joker cosplay. I didn’t want her pity. I didn’t want anyone to see that the accident had permanently twisted my smile into a cruel grimace.

“Did you see Melody?”

The whispers started during my government class.

“I feel so sorry for her; no one deserves that.”

“To be honest, she actually scares me a little bit now.”

My table partner, Terence, raised an eyebrow at me, silently asking if I was okay. I bit my lip, gently shaking my head. How could I answer him? I never chose to be this way, and it was hitting me harder than I thought it would. As I packed up my things and left the room with the Terence’s eyes trailing the air behind me, my heart ached for my mother. But I knew she was gone, and there wasn’t any way to bring her back.

It wasn’t until I left the building after my last class that the whispers finally stopped. I figured they couldn’t chase me anymore if I ran. I’d begged my dad that morning to let me go to work after school, and I was sincerely regretting that now. Silly me, I had thought going to work at our little family diner would help me get my life back in gear after doing very little during my recovery. Now all I wanted to do was dig the deepest hole ever dug and just hide in it.

“Melody!”

I turned to see Eleanor falling into pace beside me, her bright blue eyes no longer carrying the sadness they had been full of earlier.

“Are you working tonight?” she asked, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

I nodded. “I’d planned on it, but I think I might see if my dad will let me back out.”

She stopped walking and placed her hands on her hips. “Mel, don’t you dare. You told me yourself last night that you wanted to get your life back. Prove it.”

I wanted to laugh at her small form, looking so determined and carrying a backpack that weighed as much as she did. But I didn’t. I knew she was right, and it was no one’s fault but mine if my life became something I wallowed around miserably in.

“Fine. But at least let me take the less busy tables today. I don’t think I could stand it if I had to ask a group of people the size of a small country for their orders looking like this.”

She playfully nudged me. “Hey, but at least it would make their day interesting, eh? You might end up being even more popular than the bearded lady,” she said, pretending to stroke an imaginary beard.

I snorted. “If anyone’s going to be our bearded lady, I vote that it’s you. Facial hair is not my forte.”

She laughed and ran ahead of me, grabbing me by the wrist and towing me behind her. I couldn’t help but laugh along with her.

When we reached the little worn-down diner my family owned, storm clouds had begun to gather, threatening to start pouring at any moment. Turning a nervous eye to the darkening sky, we quickly ducked into the building, the warm, inviting scents coming from the kitchens making me stop for a moment and inhale deeply. It smelled like home. We dropped off our school things in the back room and changed into our matching seafoam green uniforms.

“I still don’t know why my dad thought this was a good color,” I muttered, adjusting the white pocketed apron tied around my waist.

Eleanor swiftly knotted her apron and shoved her hair into a ponytail, making her way through the side door to take care of our outdoor tables. “At least they’re better than the neon orange ones the diner started out with, don’t you think?”

I opened my mouth to respond, but I was stopped short by at tap on my shoulder.

“Mel, can you take table number five, please? I’ve got my hands full right now.”

My brother, Christopher, flashed me a grateful smile as I nodded and hurried off with my pen and paper. A familiar face was seated with the other occupant of table five.

I lifted a hand in greeting. “Terence, I didn’t know you were stopping by.”

The corner of his mouth lifted in a gentle half-smile. “I didn’t even know you worked here, Melody.”

“Well, I don’t hang around just for fun,” I try to mimic his half-smile, but the right side of my face stays motionless. As usual. I clear my throat. “So, can I start you guys out with some drinks?”

I was so focused on him that I hadn’t realized that the woman seated in the booth across from him were staring at me.

“Water’s fine for me,” Terence replied.

I distractedly marked it down with a few swift strokes of my pen and turned to his company. “And for you?”

The woman I didn’t recognize had shimmering ebony hair and storm-colored eyes. She could’ve have been pretty in another life if it wasn’t for the condescending sneer etched on her face as she looked me up and down. “I don’t want anything at all if it’s coming from a freak like you.”

The hand holding my pen began to tremble. In fury or fear, I still don’t know. “What did you just say to me?” My face crumpled, and I could feel the backs of my eyes starting to heat up as tears threatened to spill out. Outside, lightning flashed.

Her cool, gray eyes met mine. “I said I don’t want anything at all if you’re going to be handling it.” She studied her nails in a bored manner. “In fact, I bet even your own mother would agree with me.”

Thunder rumbled as I drew myself up to my full height. “Don’t you dare speak about my mother that way,” I hissed, slamming my pad of paper down on the surface of table five.

The woman didn’t move. She simply lifted an eyebrow at me, her face silently challenging me. Terence was frantically trying to salvage the situation, but I silenced him with a wave of my hand.   “My mother died last year.” I was almost shouting now, but I couldn’t stop. “I didn’t choose to lose my mom, get hit by a car, and have my face be a freak show! So don’t you even think about playing the victim here when I’m the one who’s lost everything.”

The diner went silent as the tears I had been holding back finally burst past my defenses. Christopher rushed over to me as I pressed the fabric of my apron against my eyes, trying to still the sobs that shook my entire body. His arms wrapped around my shoulders, and I leaned into the comforting warmth of my brother, letting him murmur comforting words into my hair. I hated her, I hated her words, and I hated myself for being sucked into believing them.

  Terence’s voice cut through the steady rain pattering on the rooftop. “What you said was unacceptable . . . mother.”

I wiped my eyes and took in the blurry scene in front of me. Terence was standing over his mother with a look that could’ve shaken the courage of even the bravest warrior, his hands curling and uncurling into fists.

  “How could you talk to her like that? She’s strong, I’ll give you that, but she’s human all the same.” He ran a hand through his dark curls. “And she can break just like you and I.” He got to his feet, hauling his mother up with him.

I gently pushed my way out of my brother’s arms and started to make a break for the back room where I could hide from the thick tension choking the air. A hand on my wrist stopped me from fleeing. I turned to see Terence clutching me like a drowning man.

“Terence?” My voice broke.

“Melody, don’t listen to a word she said. My mother is mentally disabled, but that doesn’t excuse what she did to you.” His hands moved up to my shoulders as he spoke earnestly. “You are so much stronger than she can ever know, and I hope . . . ” He closed his eyes and sighed. “What I mean is . . . don’t let any of this stop you.”

  He dropped his hands from my shoulders and walked away with his arm guiding his mother out the door. As he turned back one final time, I lifted a shaking hand in farewell, mouthing a silent promise to his retreating form.

  I would not let this stop me. Freak or not, my life was mine to live, and I wasn’t going to let anyone take that right away from me. Not even myself.

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That is all.

Cheers,

Sea