Dear Blank, Please Blank

Ah, sometimes websites are annoying pieces of junk that make you so frustrated you want to give it a nice kick or perhaps sing it to death. Other times, it's quite amusing. Such as the website of Dear Blank Please Blank. Here are some fun ones I spotted while journeying there.

Dear Santa,

I'll save you some time in making your list. I plan on being very bad this year.

Sincerely, Lord Voldemort.

Dear faucets that turn on by pushing the handle,

Please try to stay on for more than 3 seconds.

Sincerely, tired of having to push you 50 times to rinse the soap off.

Dear kid wearing a Halloween costume made of bubble wrap,

How did you not pop every last bubble while making that thing?

Sincerely, person with no self control when it comes to bubble wrap.

Dear Present Self,

Please don't do that...

Sincerely, Future Self.

Dear Dorothy,

Not in Kansas anymore? Thanks... because the lollipops and yellow brick road totally didn't give that away.

Sincerely, Toto.

Dear black thing on the floor,

I thought you were a chocolate chip...

Sincerely, Shouldn't have eaten that

Dear television shows,

We get 3 minutes in between classes. Our lockers are about 7 inches wide. No one decorates them like that either, and no one is ever that obnoxious about joining school clubs.

Sincerely, an actual middle school student.

Dear clothing store,

Please buy normal maniquins without hair and faces like everyone else.

Sincerely, I just apologized to one for bumping into one.

Dear China,

What do you call your nice dinner plates?

Sincerely, curious.

Dear SUV drivers,

If you can't park it between the lines, you probably shouldn't be driving it.

Sincerely, climbing into my car through the sun roof.

That is all.
<3 Seana